Xmas Movie Review: A Bad Moms Christmas (2017) - Part 1

Updated: Jan 25

Spoiler Alert: This Xmas movie review has spoilers and will be the first of many reviews.

Bonjour, mon ami! I love forward-thinking open movies about blended families. A Bad Moms Christmas does a really good job detailing common insecurities that parents have about Christmas and hosting families. Particularly the troubles of dealing with overbearing mothers.

There's the Perfectionist/Bossy Mom, The Smothering/Lonely Mom, and the Super Aloof/Addict Mom. The dynamics of mothers and their daughters specifically is its own special hell. You can both love and strongly dislike your mother.

I love my mother, but I don't always like her as a person. Sometimes we're best friends and sometimes she mean girls the shit out of me by undercutting my self-esteem in two sentences. Your mother can read you like no other and she trained you to be just like her. Except, you're not just like you're mother and that is what pisses her off. You both honor each other and psychologically manipulate each other sometimes consciously and always sub-consciously. We are all humans who are shaped by our previous trauma and so we turn out a bit weird and unique. But the trauma and timing of events is always different, personalities and perceptions are different, and we're all trying our best to live our lives. In the process of doing so we get our feelings hurt because we all want the people in our lives to play a specific role or part that we've assigned them in our heads. When they don't meet our expectations, we start to dislike and judge the other person. And we shouldn't judge. We should just accept them for who they are, a neutral approach.

Mina Kunis' character (Amy) sums it up perfectly:

Amy: No, honey, it's not gonna be fine. My mom is the most critical human being on the planet. When I was six year's old, I made her a birthday card. And she returned it with notes.

Jessie: Okay, that's fucked up.

Amy: The point is she's perfect at everything and she is impossible to please.

Jessie: But if she's impossible to please, why are you trying so hard to please?

Amy: Listen, I'll tell you the truth. Daughters spend their whole lives trying to please their mothers, and mothers spend their whole lives shitting all over their daughters. It's just how the world works. Okay? I can't fix that. I'm not, I'm not fucking Beyonce.

And Jay Hernandez's character, Jessie, has the perfect spouse response: "Well, y-y-you are to me." That's a good spouse, coming in with the support right at the end. He both acknowledges her frustration while also saying, but you got this. I love this moment.

This is a great way to support your spouse in a moment of torment. For whatever reason we find pain in our past and we obsess over it as if our circumstances could have been changed growing up. But we can only accept where we came from, learn from our trauma and our past, learn from others' trauma, and adapt/grow/change to be better than the last generation. Pray that we don't pass down our neuroses to our children. But we will somehow, just in a new, fresh hell kind of way because, "It's just how the world works. Okay? I can't fix that. I'm not, I'm not fucking Beyonce."

Peace, love, and kindness.

Yours Truly

#MerryMarie #ChristmastSprite #ABadMomsChristmas

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